“Harp Life” – My Social Media Image

Most of my harp life is pretty boring. I play a few weddings a year, and if I’m lucky I might even participate in a recording project or two. Lately I’ve been trying to “revamp” my online image, and it’s a strange journey to say the least.

Anyone who wants to market themselves as a business online knows the importance of consistency. Depending on the nature of the business and the platform on which it is being promoted, marketing professionals will recommend posting several times a week, if not per day. This will vary across platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, WordPress, etc. The fun part is I enjoy making online content look pretty. The funny part is my life is not as action-packed as I promote it to be. Yet promotions are important to keep oneself relevant, talked about, noticed.

Lately I have been focused on streamlining my image to promote myself as a harpist, and I am working to become more consistent with that across my social media platforms. When I first started this blog, it was in attempt to narrow down my decision on an undergrad major. If you read my older posts, you may see an evolution of my growth, but often I feel like my thoughts are all over the place. Ultimately I have kept this blog going because I enjoy writing about life and things I’m learning or am passionate about. But consistency has always been hard for me.

Still, my efforts are a work in progress, and I’m enjoying the progress I’m making this year.

photo by Sarah Cannavino

Setting an Intention with Technology

At the beginning of many yoga sessions you’ll hear the instructor prompt you to set an intention for the practice. It’s not typically a physical goal as much as a spiritual thought: “I am focused.” or “I am strong.” A few months ago I found myself needing to set an intention of a different sort: for my computer.

After a long and productive life, my laptop began to die. Slowly at first, but then with overwhelming acceleration until I decided it was time to get a new one. I needed several weeks to save up, so I would have to go without for awhile. And oh, did it refresh my appreciation for technology.

I still had my phone to check email and manage important tasks. In fact, I easily go a couple days without using my computer at all normally. But the luxury of having it available at all times was one that disappeared during those weeks.

What do I use my computer for? Often I much prefer a computer to compose emails and messages (excluding texts). I organize my thoughts better on a big screen with a keyboard having real keys. Occasionally I will edit videos to post on YouTube or create music in GarageBand or Logic. Of course I blog, and any general reading or research I do I prefer to do on a computer.

So for those unique weeks I found myself without this resource readily available. But it pushed me toward a new solution: the public library. While I love my library primarily for the books, I learned the value of checking out a laptop for an hour. With the precious time I had, I forced myself to create goals and focus on what I needed to do in that hour. I spent time responding to emails and Facebook messages. I read and wrote and researched. I even allowed myself some scroll time on Facebook. And it was glorious.

The time without my own computer felt new and different. I possess a deeper thankfulness for the one I do have now. And the focused time in the library reminded me to carry a similar intention with me in my day-to-day perspective.

15 Books Women Should Read

I came across a list entitled “25 Books Every Girl Should Read Before She Turns 25.” I am now rushing to read them all because my birthday is in just a few weeks. Upon looking over the list, I realized a lot of the books are novels. I have nothing against novels; in fact, I should probably read more. However, I’m going through a stage now where nonfiction is more interesting to me. Because a person’s twenties are such a crucial decade to one’s development and growth, I find it important to read material that aides in that.

As such, I have decided to make a list of books I have read that have been helpful in my journey of self-discovery (yes, some of them are even novels). They may not be for everyone, as they are specific to my needs and beliefs, but perhaps you will find one or two that are helpful to you. Feel free to add more suggestions in the comments below.

Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes

If you’re not big into reading, don’t start with this one. It’s amazing, but it also took me months to read. But it’s worth it! It explains the wisdom of ancient tales and the lessons we can learn from them. It travels deep into the female psyche, teaching women to unlock their inner wisdom.
Spider Woman’s Web by Susan Hazen-Hammond

I think of this one as almost a simpler version of Women Who Run With the Wolves. A swift read, but a meaningful one. It also explores old tales, but specifically focusing on those of Native American tradition. At the end of each chapter are questions beckoning readers to dig deep within themselves, exploring their past and embracing their present.
Released from Shame by Sandra D. Wilson

This is a fantastic book for anyone struggling with relentless shame, low self-worth, doubt, etc. Even if this doesn’t describe you, it opens a window of understanding toward those it does describe. Again, it challenges the reader to look inward for growth and self-awareness.
Will I Ever Be Good Enough? by Karyl McBride

Think of this book as a very specific version of Released from Shame. It peers into rocky relationships between mothers and daughters, and it reveals how influential the mother-daughter relationship is in women’s lives. Even if you have/had a great relationship with your mother, this can be helpful in accessing your own inner mother to yourself as well as growing as a mother to your children.
The Vagina Monologues by Eve Ensler

Some people love it, some people don’t. But it certainly does offer interesting perspectives on the female genitalia.
Emotionally Healthy Spirituality by Peter Scazzero

The author emphasizes the importance of not sacrificing that which is good and healthy in the name of being “spiritual.” It is written from a Christian perspective, but the points made are excellent for those of any spiritual background. Emotional health is an important thing, and good spirituality should enhance that, not sabotage it.
The Absolutely True Diary of a Part Time Indian by Sherman Alexie

A novel about a young, Native American man and his journey of transferring schools and the experiences that come with it. I have almost no grounds to relate to this character, but the author did a fantastic job of placing me in the character’s shoes to understand his thoughts and feelings. It also gave me a clearer perspective of modern Native American culture.
The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell

I was required to read this book for a writing class I took, but I learned a lot about societal trends and how little things can become epidemics. An example that immediately comes to mind is how Justin Bieber became so popular almost overnight. Gladwell doesn’t specifically mention Justin Bieber, but that’s kinda of the idea of what he talks about.
The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

A coming of age novel about a young man following his dream. I normally hate the idea of “following your dreams,” (a topic for a different post), but I’d say this story is far from cheesy.
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime by Mark Haddon

A novel I couldn’t put down, giving me the perspective of one whose life is very different from mine, and also increasing my empathy and understanding for others.
A Three Dog Life by Abigail Thomas

Written by a woman whose husband was forever changed by a terrible accident, A Three Dog Life chronicles her journey of creating a new normal. My comments cannot do this books justice. But I will say that it was enriching for me to read because it helped me step outside my personal bubble to learn about someone who is in a different stage of life from me.
The Things They Carried by Tim O’Brien

I found an deepening of two things as a result of having reading this book: my understanding of those involved in/affected by the Vietnam War, and my respect for said people.
Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller

The subtitle of this book is “Nonreligious Thoughts on Christian Spirituality.” Written by a former atheist, the author is not trying to shove an ideology down your throat. He’s simply writing about his experience, which I loved reading about. Great for those exploring their own spirituality.
A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23 by W. Phillip Keller

Psalm 23 is a commonly quoted poem at funerals, but that wasn’t necessarily what the original author had in mind when he wrote it. This book is written by a shepherd who knows the ins and outs of the daily life of sheep, and it will increase your appreciation for the shepherd’s psalm.
Sexual Fluidity by Lisa Diamond

I don’t have a lot of well-developed thoughts on this book because I’m still reading it. However, I am learning more about female sexuality, and it’s fascinating.

Dear Baby Boomers

I know the title is very specific, but I am writing this for anyone who is learning about the internet, especially those of the baby boomer generation and older (although younger people can benefit as well).

Before I begin, please do not interpret this as me talking down to you. That is not my aim at all. This is coming from a genuine concern for those who may be less familiar with the internet and what mysteries lie throughout. Listed below are certain elements that can be dangerous or destructive. People could spend weeks writing adding to and elaborating on this list, but these are just a handful that come to my mind.

Phishing
Many of you may already be familiar with this. Phishing is basically attempted theft of your money or personal information. Common examples of this include emails from people claiming to be from a foreign country in dire need of help, those who say they have recently had a death in the family and need someone to help with the inheritance money, or websites that shout, “You’ve Won!” in flashy advertisements. Ignore all of these, because they are not genuine. They are simply trying to steal your personal information (email, bank account info, etc).

Trolling
The definition of an internet troll is a very specific one. If someone is a troll, they post radical or nasty comments for the sake of starting an argument online. These comments may or may not include truth in them, but ultimately the purpose is to elicit a response from people. For example: if I were to say, “You are going to hell because you drank a glass of wine,” somewhere on the internet, no doubt my comment may be met with intense debate on religious practices, the existence of hell, or the effects of drinking a glass of wine. If someone accuses you of being a troll on the internet, it doesn’t matter how genuinely you believe in what you are saying; others are seeing it as an attempt to ruffle feathers for no reason. Arguments involving trolling are never productive because they only result in infuriated people instead of intelligent discussion.

Revenge Porn
You decide to take provocative pictures of yourself to send your significant other. Some time later, the two of you break up, ending the relationship on bad terms. Your partner is angry and posts your revealing photos online for others to ogle at and make perverted or degrading comments about your body.

Kidnapping
You are babysitting your young granddaughter and you post a picture of her from your phone to Facebook with the caption, “Look at this little angel I get to see every week.” Meanwhile, the location services are enabled on your phone, meaning you may have accidentally also posted your address (location services allow you to use the gps on your phone, and location services on Facebook allow you to tell others where you are). A pedophile uses his tricks to get past your privacy settings and see exactly where you live and when you posted the photo. With this information, he begins spying on your house and learns when your granddaughter comes to visit. One moment she will be playing in the yard, and the next moment she will be gone.

Cyber Bullying
This tends to be more common among the younger generations. You may have known the kid that people teased at the playground, but this is much worse. Complete strangers will call someone fat, ugly, or other hateful names. Some will go as far as to suggest that the victim should kill him/herself because they don’t deserve to exist. And sometimes the victim will kill him/herself after becoming overwhelmed with the abuse.

Fake News
There are countless news websites that are purely satirical and should not be taken seriously. The Onion is a classic example, and they declare on their website that the information they post is satirical. Occasionally you will come across articles from unfamiliar websites that may or may not contain accurate information. It is always important to fact check before becoming outraged about a certain issue that does not even exist. A quick Google search can often resolve the question, although sometimes the answer is more challenging to find. This is why you must take anything you watch or read with a grain of salt until you are sure you can trust the source.

Hopefully you find this list helpful. My knowledge on this subject is very limited, but I have seen multiple examples of some of the above situations that can be remedied with a little extra caution and discernment.

Minimalism and the Internet

I am now settled into my new apartment with the adventures of adulthood knocking at my door. For the first month of my living here, I thought I would experiment with not purchasing a wifi plan and seeing how long I could last.

Not the best idea.

I will say this: I’m not a fan of people who are addicted to their screens. Sometimes I can be that person, although I try not to be. I figured it was worth trying to go without internet and therefore purging what wasn’t adding value to my life. Hopefully it would force me to get out more.

The problem I had was that instead of going out more, I stayed in more. I cocooned. Being introverted, I already don’t like to go out much, and not having internet only made me feel more lonely and less connected. Sometimes, if I have several days off from work, I may not even leave my house because I see no reason to. I entertain myself with cleaning, crafting, and reading. Sometimes I would try to hang out with friends, but I’m also in that stage where I’m trying to find a community outside of college, which brings with it its own unique challenges. There are only so many things to do inside a house before boredom joins the party.

I want to view the internet as a tool, and I admit I do waste time on it, but if I’m not going to leave my house anyway, at least the internet gives me the ability to find new articles, watch movies, and see what other people my age are up to.

Hopefully as time goes on, I may find more valuable ways to pass the time, but for now, this is where I am in my journey.

If Facebook Were a Woman

4/2013

So, you’re the one
Who causes all the trouble. Dressed
In blue makes you look innocent,
but you still manage to steal
my eyes for hours. “Come on,
what’s what harm?” you ask me,
showing off some of your recent pictures.
Another cute bunny or advice
on dieting. But if I see one more kitten
I think I might throw up. You know,

You are a great photographer, especially
when the photos aren’t yours. But that’s okay
because you change your style so often
that your selfies would become outdated
really fast. You’re a great seducer. Those
green kisses on familiar faces force me to think
that my friends may want to talk to me,
but you lure them to yourself
with your latest gossip.
You have a way with words.

You sit back and chuckle
pretending not to notice how many relationships
you’ve ended, how many fights you started,
and how many times people share
your poisonous words of “wisdom” and “inspiration”.
You seem to thrive on clutching people’s throats
and holding on for dear life, while still
convincing others to do the same. Temptation
never felt so subtle, but honey I know
you’ve got me good.

My Thoughts on Facebook Fasting

Periodically I’ll see some of my Facebook friends announce that they are going on a Facebook fast: “Leaving Facebook for x days; text if you need to reach me.” While it sounds like a good idea, I have never officially done my own Facebook fast other than when I was traveling or at summer camp. I think a break from the internet can definitely be a good thing, both for the mind and the body, but I have some mixed thoughts about it as well.

Hearing about someone going on a Facebook fast sounds pretty similar to someone announcing they’re going on a diet. It’s short term and may have some benefits, but it takes discipline, it’s easy to give up on, and it probably won’t affect you much in the long term. I’m not a big fan of diets, but I am a fan of healthy living.

Personally I don’t do internet fasts because I want to be reachable if people need to contact me, especially if they want to schedule something last minute that I wouldn’t see if I were on a fast. A one-time internet fast isn’t likely to accomplish much (for me), but I do like the idea of trying to moderate how much time I spend on the internet on a regular basis. Maybe that means taking a day each week/month and not checking Facebook. More practically for me it means not checking my email constantly throughout the day.

Personal internet moderation is something I still need to work on – I still fall into the trap of sitting in front of my computer screen when I’m bored, or even when I should be doing other things. For some people, Facebook fasts are great. For me personally, I don’t want to go on a diet; I want to improve my lifestyle.